A trip to hell and back
Dear Hannah,Last night I dreamed I ate a poisonous flower with a hundred soft white petals. Everyone was doing it, so it seemed reasonable to go along with them. And our reasoning for eating it was...
View ArticleInsanity in Indiana
Dear Hannah,Due to a recent law protecting the rights of Indiana's business-owners, in what has got to be the bravest political move in Seattle history, our mayor has finally decided to stop funding...
View ArticleHomeschoolers and gay lovers
Dear Hannah,I heard someone express one time that a good number of Disney/Pixar films were aimed at getting children to come out of the closet. I'm not so certain, after considering not only the...
View ArticleSo you say you hate the Puritans
Dear Hannah,Despite the fact that Oliver Cromwell was vastly superior to Charles I, I have yet to hear anyone praise Cromwell for deposing and killing him. There have been many reasonable objections...
View ArticleTwo tips to avoid being used by men
Dear Hannah,So far as I can remember, there are really two kinds of advice: how you should do something you want to do, and whether or not you should do it. The unfortunate thing about the latter kind...
View ArticleLiving in the age of autism
Dear Hannah,Learning is a difficult process -- not just for autistic kids: for me. For instance, there are certain things a man should know the second time through them; certain signs he should begin...
View ArticleIn defense of an openly-racist magazine
Dear Hannah,One nearly universal fact of human nature is that if you tell people not to read something, they'll begin to want to read it. Another fact of human nature is that if a man begins to feel...
View ArticleSummoning the Prince of Darkness
Dear Hannah,When I was young, my mom always advised me to never summon Satan if I think he's nearby, because she was worried he might show up. And so, naturally, I did what every young boy would do...
View ArticleShould women be allowed to drink?
Dear Hannah,In an age of social liberalism, you can expect to see many things become legal. One thing that hasn't become legal and that almost nobody has considered legalizing is childhood drinking....
View ArticleTo love being American (classic essay)
Dear Hannah,Being an American is a messy business. Nobody watches the mediocre or the boring; the whole world has better things to do than sing about Scotland, and none of the African states are very...
View ArticleHow to fake the presence of God
Dear Hannah,I should probably preface this letter by admitting I'm not one of those people who says that all religions are saying the same thing. I'm also not one of those people who says that all...
View ArticleAmy Schumer, champion of feminine jealousy
Dear Hannah,One of the great tragedies of the modern era is that the people who are supposed to be championing the advancement of women know the least about the possibilities of womankind. It doesn't...
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Thoughts on Gay Pride Month
Dear Hannah, This morning I was informed that we've stumbled into a month of gay pride, which led me to ask a lot of uncomfortable questions about the sanity of the American public. I asked -- for...
View ArticleIf God is dead, then God's Not Dead killed Him: a very late film review
Dear Hannah,Imagine, for a moment, that a society of Elvis fans pooled together a bunch of money and decided to prove that Elvis was alive. And so they got a lot of marketers and Kevin Sorbo and all...
View ArticleA defense of police brutality in general
Dear Hannah,If you ever happen to watch Game of Thrones, you'll get to know a character named Stannis Baratheon. What's most interesting about Stannis is that he's been burning innocents to death since...
View ArticleSpeak now, or forever hold your peace
Dear Hannah,Although I've witnessed several horrible marriages in my lifetime, there was really only one time I ever felt forced to attend a wedding, and it involved a woman I very much adore marrying...
View ArticleThe most difficult thing about being a Catholic
Dear Hannah,Throughout my life I've heard many people say I don't know what it feels like to be black in America. Aside from the fact that nobody has ever proposed the opposite, that black people have...
View Article"If necessary, use words" and other nonsense
Dear Hannah,You may have heard people say by this point "preach the Gospel. If necessary, use words." It may be safely translated, stop preaching. I've never heard it used in any other context than...
View ArticleHow to tell if God is trying to kill you
Dear Hannah,It should seem strange to anyone who reads the Bible that after all the talk about God judging the nations, Evangelicals think they know how He's going to do it. The truth is that they...
View ArticleHow to ruin your homeschooled child
Dear Hannah,Something that's given me an almost endless source of amusement is the public's response to an essay I wrote about homeschoolers, mostly because they said I have no idea what I'm talking...
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